U.C.M. Newsletter of Joy, Humor, Laughter, and Inspiration
Editor: Rev. Doti Boon
Volume 9 page 4 (1-28-10)
I strongly support the Spiritual Passions of others and myself.
Passion: ”A strong barely controllable emotion.”
That definition is what most of us think when we hear the word “passion.” This definition of passion refers to physical passion, an emotion that relates to our Ego.
Physical passion is a fleeting emotion of the physical, material and mental world, which our senses occupy during our current incarnation. Physical passion can manifest itself as lust, anger or any other strong emotion that quickly passes. It is like the flame of a candle blown by a strong wind that is extinguished long before the candle has been consumed.
However, there is another kind of Passion. It is Spiritual Passion. Spiritual Passion is the Feelings, Desires and Dreams borne by our Spiritual Nature. And unlike the physical passion that quickly extinguishes itself in the wind, our Spiritual Passion is like the slow-burning candle that is located within, and protected by the safe confines of a Temple. And the Temple that protects the slow-burning candle of our Spiritual Passion is that Spiritual Temple that is our Spiritual Self.
It is a Flame that cannot be extinguished. And although it can be suppressed, and ignored, the flame of our Spiritual Passion can never be “blown out.”
Although we may feel that our Spiritual Passion must be a grandiose calling, it is not so. Our Spiritual Passion is not something we are “fanatical” about, or brag about. It is not something we “think” that the world “needs” and only we can “provide.”
Our Spiritual Passion is the slow-burning candle flame that consumes the majority of our private thoughts and feelings. It is that one Spiritual Activity we call forward and enjoy whenever our chores and obligations of the day are completed.
What is it that we revert to at our every opportunity? Is it gardening, painting, writing, singing, playing (or composing) music…???
Whatever it is, that is our Spiritual Passion . . . our Divine Gift . . . Our Divine Calling.
To burn always with this hard, gemlike flame, to maintain this ecstasy, is success in life.
Every wakeful step, every mindful act is the direct path to awakening. Wherever you go, there you are. Buddha
Real joy comes not from ease or riches or from praise of men, but from doing something worthwhile. Sir Wilfred Grenfell
No pessimist ever discovered the secret of the stars, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new heaven to the human spirit. Helen Keller
A child was asked to write a book report on the entire Bible
The Children’s Bible in a Nutshell
In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas. The Bible says,’ The Lord thy God is one, but I think He must be a lot older than that. Anyway, God said, ‘Give me a light!’ and someone did.
Then God made the world.
He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren’t embarrassed because mirrors hadn’t been invented yet.
Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden…Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn’t have cars.
Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel.
Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except for Methuselah, who lived to be like a million or something.
One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of his kids was kind of a Ham. Noah built a large boat and put his family and some animals on it. He asked some other people to join him, but they said they would have to take a rain check.
After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some pot roast. Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat.
Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston. Moses led the Israel Lights out of Egypt and away from the evil Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh’s people. These plagues included frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable.
God fed the Israel Lights every day with manicotti. Then he gave them His Top Ten Commandments. These include: don’t lie, cheat, smoke, dance, or covet your neighbor’s stuff.
Oh, yeah, I just thought of one more: Humor thy father and thy mother.
One of Moses’ best helpers was Joshua who was the first Bible guy to use spies. Joshua fought the battle of Geritol and the fence fell over on the town.
After Joshua came David. He got to be king by killing a giant with a slingshot. He had a son named Solomon who had about 300 wives and 500 porcupines. My teacher says he was wise, but that doesn’t sound very wise to me.
After Solomon there were a bunch of major league prophets. One of these was Jonah, who was swallowed by a big whale and then barfed up on the shore.
There were also some minor league prophets, but I guess we don’t have to worry about them.
After the Old Testament came the New Testament. Jesus is the star of The New. He was born in Bethlehem in a barn. (I wish I had been born in a barn too, because my mom is always saying to me, ‘Close the door! Were you born in a barn?’ It would be nice to say, ‘As a matter of fact, I was.’)
During His life, Jesus had many arguments with sinners like the Pharisees and the Democrats.
Jesus also had twelve opossums.
The worst one was Judas Asparagus. Judas was so evil they named a terrible vegetable after him.
Jesus was a great man. He healed many leopards and even preached to some Germans on the Mount.
But all those guys put Jesus on trial before Pontius the Pilot. Pilot didn’t stick up for Jesus. He just washed his hands instead.
Anyways, Jesus died for our sins, and then came back to life again. He went up to Heaven but will be back at the end of the Aluminum. His return is foretold in the book of Revolution.
Submitted by Rev. Janet Ewers