A Joyful Noise

U.C.M. Newsletter of Joy, Humor, Laughter, and Inspiration

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Editor: Rev. Doti Boon

safedoti@aol.com

Vol. 9 pg. 50 (12-16-10)

All UCM Charters are encouraged to utilize the

Joyful Noise to advertise upcoming classes and events.


AFFIRMATION

I am a loving child of God, spreading happiness

and joy throughout the land at this Holiday time.

It’s the time of year when folks complain they aren’t feeling any holiday cheer. I think it’s because we anesthetize ourselves with being busy, all the time, to make ourselves feel fulfilled – in other words: working, cleaning, studying, driving through traffic, being on the cell phone, emailing and paging, anything but being spiritually connected. We’ve started to look at the holidays as an interruption to “doing things” because it gets in the way of our routine. On top of it all, it has become less simple and more stressful than it used to be. Years ago the major portion of the holiday was spent stringing popcorn, making cookies, building toys and enjoying our family and friends. Now it has become a retail frenzy; a mall activity of buying bigger and better things for more people and less about “Joy to the World” and “Peace on Earth.”

Take time to slow down and remember we are celebrating the birth of the Christ child, the turning of the wheel, the mid-time of winter, and the delight in being alive. The warmth of family and friends are more important than trying to connect with the latest high-tech gadgets and best Gucci bag. Don’t make yourself a stress victim of the holidays, feeling overwhelmed and exhausted.

Stress is the leading cause of just about every health problem. All of the stress we have during the holidays can cause major illnesses at the time we want to be healthy, excited and loving towards our family and friends.

Think about that. Do you want to do Christmas with misery or do you want to do it with mirth? Laughter is contagious. It’s the antidote to frustration and anxiety. Get out and look at the beautiful lights, sing carols, watch fun movies, wear outrageous red and green clothes, gather together and giggle with friends over fruitcake and eggnog (or in my case, Diet Pepsi), Jim’s Snickerdoodles and Regina’s fudge!

When you are feeling excited and fun-loving you exude positive emotions and have less illness. All research on exercise and good eating amazingly shows the most beneficial attributes to staying well are: being in a state of positive energy, laughing, loving, a nurturing spiritual community and supportive family and friends. So join us on this Sunday to get it all!

We received all of those things at the monthly meditation at UCM headquarters. The beautifully decorated library was over-flowing with evergreen branches and twinkling candles for a Christmas celebration. We meditated to the calming voice of UCM president Rev. Sandy Clark and then some of the evening was spent singing old time holiday favorites. However, we were all a little amazed at some of the “extra verses.” Ronnie Grigsby was wonderful at keeping us on beat and thank goodness I was sitting next to him. My woeful rendition of “It Came Upon a Midnight Clear” was a small squeaky and pitiful sound next to his magnificent voice.  All the room was filled with the energies of beautiful angels; alive and in spirit. I know the calm and peacefulness of our two hours in such a loving space, the warmth and love from our spiritual community and the laughter of friends has set the tone for my next twelve days of Christmas. Rev. Lynn Rogers did psychic readings for all in attendance. Of course the decorated cookies and hot cider were very welcome on a cold winter’s night.

Please take time for yourself, listen to the joyful lyrics of holiday songs, share good news and positive thoughts, gather folks together in harmony and remember – friends, family, children and even grand- children need your love and the experience of having YOU, an exciting and unique person, in their lives for a very long time. Give that to them – it’s the best gift you have!  Especially with Snickerdoodles and Fudge!

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The Christmas Diet

Twas the night before Christmas and all round my hips were Jim’s Snickerdoodles that had somehow sneaked past my lips. Regina’s Fudge was stored in the freezer with care in hopes that my thighs would forget they were there.

While Rachel Ray was prattling on late night T.V. and NCIS had developed a new theory – Out in the cupboards there arose such a clatter I sprang from the leather couch to see what was the matter.

Away to the kitchen I flew like a flash tore open the window and looked for my stash. The rocky-road look of the lawn newly mowed sent thoughts of an ice cream binge to my body below.

When what to my wandering eyes should appear: a marzipan Santa with eight chocolate reindeer! That huge chunk of candy so luscious and slick I knew in a second that I’d wind up sick.

The sweet-coated Santa, those sugared reindeer, I closed my eyes tightly but still I could hear; On Nutri-System, on Atkins, on South Beach, on TOPS – a Weight Watcher dropout from sugar detox.

From the top of the scales to the top of the hall now dash away pounds now dash away all. Dressed up in Lane Bryant from my head to nightdress my clothes were all bulging from too much excess.

My droll little mouth and my round fat belly they shook when I laughed like a bowl full of jelly. I spoke not a word but went straight to my work, ate all of the candy and then turned with a jerk.

And laying a finger beside my heartburn I gave a quick nod, toward the bedroom I turned. I eased into bed, to the heavens I cry, “if only temptation is removed I’ll get thin by and by.”

And I mumbled again as I turned in for the night, “in the morning I’ll starve. . . ’til I take that first bite.” Snickerdoodles anyone?

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CHRISTMAS CAROLS — choose your category???

* 1. Schizophrenia — Do you hear what I hear?

* 2. Multiple Personality Disorder — We Three Kings Disoriented Are.
* 3. Dementia — I Think I’m Home for Christmas…who are you?
* 4. Narcissistic Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me.
* 5. Manic — Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and…It’ll be so Festive!
* 6. Paranoid — Santa Claus is Coming to Town…to Get Me.
* 7. Borderline Personality Disorder — Yesterday, you were perfect, my hero, but today…Thoughts of Roasting You on an Open Fire.
* 8. Personality Disorder — You Better Watch Out, I’m Gonna Cry, I’m Gonna Pout, Maybe I’ll Tell You Why.
* 9. Attention Deficit Disorder — Silent night, Holy oooh look at the Froggy – can I have a chocolate, why is France so far away?
* 10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder — Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells…Do You Hear What I Hear?

The CCL Choir will be doing a lot better job!

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