A Joyful Noise!

U.C.M. Newsletter of Joy, Humor, Laughter, and Inspiration

Editor: Rev. Doti Boon

safedoti@aol.com

Vol. 10 pg 14 (04-07-11) Prayer

AFFIRMATION

I know God Hears My Prayers

There were times when I wondered if I would make it to today, but with God’s help – I did! And because I did I’m going to celebrate!

Today, I’m going to celebrate what an unbelievable life I have had so far: the accomplishments, the many blessings, and, yes, even the hardships because they have served to make me stronger.

I will go through this day with my head held high and a happy heart. And, not succumb to the craziness of Mercury being retrograde!

I will marvel at God’s seemingly simple gifts:  the morning dew, the sun, the clouds, the trees, the flowers, and the birds. Today, none of these miraculous creations will escape my notice.

Today, I will share my excitement for life with other people. I’ll make someone smile. I’ll go out of my way to perform an unexpected act of kindness for someone I don’t even know.

Today, I’ll give a sincere compliment to someone who seems down. I’ll tell a child how special he is, and I’ll tell someone I love just how deeply I care for them and how much they mean to me.

Today is the day I quit worrying about what I don’t have and start being grateful for all the wonderful things Mother/Father God has already given me. I’ll remember that to worry is just a waste of time because my faith in God’s Divine Plan ensures everything will be just fine.

And tonight, before I go to bed, I’ll go outside and raise my eyes to the heavens. I will stand in awe at the beauty of the stars and the moon, and I will praise God for these magnificent treasures.

As the day ends and I lay my head down on my pillow, I will thank the creator for the best day of my life. I will pray for all of those people in the world needing help, solace and love. And I will sleep the sleep of a contented child, excited with expectation because I know tomorrow is going to be the best day of my life, ever!

Waking Up for Church
One Sunday morning, a mother went in to wake her son and tell him it was time to get ready for church, to which he replied, “I’m not going.”
“Why not?” she asked.
“I’ll give you two good reasons” he said. “One, they don’t like me, and two, I don’t like them.”
His mother replied, “I’ll give YOU two good reasons why you SHOULD go to church. One, you’re 54 years old, and two, you’re the pastor!”

THE PASTOR’S CAT
This particular story just made me laugh.

Dwight Nelson recently told a true story about the pastor of his church. A kitten had climbed up a tree and then was afraid to come down. The pastor coaxed, offered warm milk, etc.

The kitty would not come down. The tree was not sturdy enough to climb, so the pastor decided if he tied a rope to his car and drove away so the tree bent down, he could reach up and get the kitten.

That’s what he did, all the while checking his progress in the car. He figured if he went just a little bit further, the tree would bend sufficiently to reach the kitten. He moved the car a little further and, the rope broke. The tree went “boing!” and the kitten sailed through the air-out of sight.

The pastor felt terrible and walked all over the neighborhood asking people if they’d seen a little kitten. No. Nobody had seen a stray cat. So he prayed, “God, I commit this kitten to your keeping,” and went on about his business.

A few days later, at the grocery store, he met one of his church members and glanced into her shopping cart and was amazed to see cat food. The woman was a cat hater and everyone knew it, so he asked her,“Why are you buying cat food when you hate cats?” She replied, “You won’t believe this,” and then told him how her little girl had been begging her for a cat, but she kept refusing. A few days before, the child had begged again, so she told her daughter, “Well, if God gives you a cat, I’ll let you keep it.”

She told the pastor, “I watched my child go out in the yard, get on her knees, and ask God for a cat. And really, Pastor, you won’t believe this, but I saw it with my own eyes. A kitten suddenly came flying out of the blue sky, with its paws outspread, and landed right in front of her.”
Never underestimate the Power of God’s unique sense of humor.

The Best Way To Pray:
A priest, a minister, and a guru sat discussing the best positions for prayer while a telephone repairman worked nearby. “Kneeling is definitely the best way to pray,” the priest said.
“No,” said the minister. “I get the best results standing with my hands outstretched to Heaven.”
“You’re both wrong,” the guru said. “The most effective prayer position is lying down on the floor.”
The repairman could contain himself no longer. “Hey, fellas,” he interrupted. “The best prayin’ I ever did was when I was hangin’ upside down from a telephone pole.”

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